So Cringe! The Jealousy Game of Each MBTI Type Is Wild
Did you know that jealousy behaviors vary completely by MBTI type? Actually, is that good? No, this is seriously annoying. We've compiled all the foolish moves each type makes when jealous, from ISTJ to ENFP. I'm also going to tell you how to turn it to your advantage.
ISTJ: Acts Cool but Is Boiling Inside
ISTJs try not to show jealousy. But they secretly check the other person's SNS, bring up the past, and pull moves like 'Why were you contacting that person back then?' If you respond with 'Actually, that's good?', they get even more pissed. I actually saw an ISTJ friend see her boyfriend laughing with another girl and say, 'Wait, why are you laughing? You never laugh with me.' In this case, the best tip is to first clear things up and build trust.
ENFP: Suddenly Acts Cute to Get Attention
When ENFPs get jealous, they act super cute for some reason. They joke around like 'Look at me~' and if the other person focuses on someone else, they suddenly change the subject. But is this cool? Actually, ENFPs have high self-esteem so they don't usually get jealous, but when they do, they're in a state of dopamine addiction where they want the other person to only look at them. If you act like a cool nonchalant person, you might lose them, so be careful.
ISTP: Acts Indifferent but Scours SNS
ISTPs say 'Eh, no big deal' when jealous, but alone they analyze all the other person's posts. Especially they enjoy a mystery game like 'Why did that person follow him/her?' I know an ISTP who found out their partner liked an ex's photo and said 'Ah, just friends' but then scrolled through all the liked posts for an hour. In this case, it's better to just ask honestly. ISTPs actually like directness.
ESFJ: Indirectly Expresses and Works Behind the Scenes
ESFJs don't directly say they're jealous; instead they throw annoying questions like 'I've been seeing Mr. OO a lot lately? He seems popular?' They are masters of gathering info through others. For example, they say 'I saw someone on the subway today...' and watch the other person's reaction. Since ESFJs have strong pride, it's important to send the message 'I only look at you' without hurting them.
INTJ: Logically Analyzes and Rationalizes Jealousy
When INTJs get jealous, they act like they're going to draw a chart saying 'This isn't emotional, it's a probabilistically unstable situation.' They analyze the other person's behavior patterns and find logical reasons for why they made certain choices. My INTJ friend once asked, 'The frequency you contact that person increased from every 2 days to every 3 days. What's the reason?' In this case, giving a clear explanation and building trust is a big win. If you feel wronged, avoid emotional reactions like 'Actually, it's good.'
Checklist of Extremely Disgusting Behaviors to Avoid When Jealous
- Checking the other person's SNS without permission - A stupid move that damages trust
- Bringing up past lovers to attack - Only leaves scars
- Using acquaintances to gather info - A shortcut to ruining the relationship
- Denying and avoiding emotions - Common in ISTPs and INTJs
Common Mistakes and Precautions
Many people blame themselves when jealous, thinking 'Why am I like this?' But emotions are natural. However, actions to control the other person are absolutely forbidden. For example, demands like 'Don't talk to other people' only escalate fights. Instead, it's better to honestly say 'I'm feeling a bit anxious right now.' Also, attempts to attract attention by using jealousy can backfire. It's okay to joke around like an ENFP, but indirect comments like an ESFJ can cause annoyance, so be careful.
In the end, jealousy is an emotion that arises as much as you love. But how you handle that behavior determines the relationship. Although it differs by MBTI, the most important things are honest conversation and trust. When jealousy strikes, think twice: 'Is this a foolish move?' It's the shortcut to a sweet relationship.
